Growth. I has it.

Workouts:

Monday - Two 10 mile runs (AM/PM)
Tuesday - Upper body weights & 10 minutes of abs with Cathe, my main workout squeeze

If I hadn't wimped out on my trail race in Texas on Saturday, I would really have been screwed today by Mother Nature. Today was hot and nasty and humid, and, if I had been on my regular schedule, I would have had to do some speed work this morning.  When I opened the door at 4 A.M. this morning to let out the dogs and felt the humidity and the heat (upper 70s) smack me upside the head, I was never happier that it was a cross-training day. Sometimes skipping a race/workout makes it all work out (ha!) in the end.

Because I didn't go to my race, that meant I had to do my 20 mile run that was originally on my training schedule yesterday (Monday).  Having done an 18 mile training run before going to work before, I knew that I'd fall asleep in the car on the way to work if I were to try and bust out a 20 miler in the early AM.  For us nonspeedy types, that's almost 4 hours of running before I would have headed off to the job that pays for all this running-if I hadn't fallen asleep in the car, I would have definitely conked out from the effort it takes just to press the power button on my school laptop after walking the 50 feet or so from the car to my office.  

Anyway, because sleeping in my office is frowned upon, I decided to split that 20 miler into two ten milers--one AM and one PM.  The AM one was nice. The weather was cool, there was a slight breeze, and the new dog that likes to run across the street at me while the owners yell wildly for him to stop from their bedroom window was inside for once.  But I was tired afterwards, not just from the 10 miles but also from the fact that I got in super late from Texas the night before.  So, after trotting for 10 miles and then trotting off to work and sitting in a chair all day, I was ready to keel over into someplace flat and warm and that contained a pillow and catch some Zzzzs.

But it was hot and humid when I got home.  I didn't want to go out for another 10 miles.  I forced myself out the door at 7:30, and, as the sun set, I did a 5 mile loop by my house-what I like to call an out and back and out and back course.  My legs weren't feeling too shabby, and I was surprised at that.  Maybe all that sitting at work gave the legs the rest they needed.

I did this run in my new Mizuno Wave Sayonaras, which I adore with all my heart because they are light and zippy and cause me to run much much too fast.  I have formed a bond with them that can only be described as unnatural.  I will unleash the deluge that is my adoration for these shoes in another post.

As the sun sank and the moon came out towards the middle of the run, the breeze was gentle and cool and the run became more tolerable, more enjoyable.  Well, except for the bugs would land on me or swarm my face.  That wasn't so nice.  I don't want to think about any extra protein I may have accidentally ingested.

I came back to the house soaked in sweat and dotted with dead bugs.  I was content, however.  Content and happy and all revved up.  Partly it was because of my new shoes, and partly because I was glad I hadn't skipped the second 10 miler.  That meant I wouldn't have excessive runner's guilt the rest of the week.

What I was most pleased with, however, was my growth as a runner.  As an educator, the word "growth" is replacing "achievement" in all the rhetoric surrounding our insane testing culture.  But growth is an important measure; it provides a means to reflect, to see where you have been--and where you have yet to go.  

I remember when running 10 miles was a major achievement.  I remember my first ten mile run, which was part of the training for my first half-marathon.  I recall literally trudging down the street by my house, quads locked and calves screaming, pushing with all I had to get through the last half-mile.  I collapsed when I got in the house, my legs righteously abused.  

And I ran 10 miles yesterday morning and then scampered off to work, my legs feeling as if they had just done an easy 3-miler rather than a 10-mile expedition through the almost-Wisconsin countryside.  My legs didn't feel that tired when I headed out for the second run.  While I could feel all 20 miles by the time I got done (especially in my knees today), I got up today and did my weight work without my legs giving me even a whimper.  All day at work they were feeling groovy.

I know I get down on myself all the time for cutting workouts short because of the heat, or not being able to tough out speedwork on the treadmill, or not having the confidence to think I can run a marathon faster than a 10 minute pace.  But I (like all runners at some point in their training) need to stop every now and then and look back and where I've been and compare that to what I can do now.  And then I have to allow myself to feel a little pride, a little triumph, gain a little more mojo...a little more confidence in what I can do. 

After that, then I need to look forward in order to improve.

And looking forward to the weather tomorrow, it looks like it will be cooler for my 8 x 800 workout.  Somehow I don't think I'll be cutting this session short.