New Year, New Blog Post...Same old goals.

So here we are again--at the dawn of a new year.  It's really too bad I have the same old goals as last year.  And the year before that (ad infinitum...and ad nauseam).

But let's review what those goals are anyway, just in case what's old becomes new again.  And in case I actually stick to them I'll know what they were because I wrote them down somewhere.

Goal #1: Run More

Seems simple enough, but I have only been running three days a week for about 4 years...so I decided to throw caution to the wind and add another easy run during the week.  This run will be done in the morning, and in the evening there shall be a spin workout or a weight workout.  but in order to accomplish that two-a-day workout, I also have to work on the next goal, which is....*drumroll*

Goal #2: Go home after work.

I have decided heretoforthwith that on the day I do that extra easy run in the AM that I will actually leave work on time, go home, and do at least 30 minutes of spin or weights.  I know I can do it because I actually did it today, and boy oh boy was it a new experience getting home before dark.  Even the animals were caught by surprise, especially since the male cat was in the shower when he shouldn't have been.

HYOOMAN YOU NOT SUPPOSED TO BE
HOME YET SCRAM

My co-goal with this one is also to then reward myself for skedaddling out of work on time and working out by reading in my awesome new comfy chair for the rest of the night.  I don't know if i can do that one yet because obviously I'm blogging right now instead of reading...duh.


Goal #3: Stay addicted to spin workouts.

This one is gonna be easy youbetcha.

Let's blast.

Goal #4: More sleep, please.

I tend to burn the candle at both ends when it comes to my job, so I really need to buckle down, set a bedtime, and stick to it.  If i can get the animals off the bed so I can get in, that is.

Goal #5:  Lose 20 pounds by June.

Because seriously, kids, my job-induced stress-eating is getting out of control again.

I can do better than this.

I'm 14 pounds heavier than I was at this time last year, and it's really time to get serious.  So here's what I'm doing, in a nice bulleted list because bulleted lists are awesome:

• I ordered me some Medifast.  I need structure, people, because apparently I'm no good on my own.  I am also really sick of the Nutrisystem food, which is why that wasn't ordered again.
• I'm going to stick to the Medifast plan and weigh myself every day like I used to.
• I'm gong to stop being ashamed that I gained weight and just freaking take care of this once and for all by changing my eating for the long-term.
• I'm going to stop letting work put pounds on me and find other, healthier ways to deal with the work stress as it arises.  Like picking fights with my co-workers (NOT REALLY CO-WORKERS if you're reading this).

Goal #6: Stop posting so many animal pics.

Just kidding!  I need to post WAY more animal pics, starting right.......NOW

And what have we learned from this excursion into my 2019 goals?  Well:

• Stress eating.  Buh.
• Weight gain.  Double BUH
• I stayed up past my bedtime to write this post, so going to have to restart that whole "bedtime" component of that goal.
• I am glad I added that run, if for nothing else to make me leave work on time at least one day a week.
• My weight gain is seriously bumming me out.  More about that in another post.
• What the world needs is more animal pics.  Right....NOW

Upcoming workouts: Last two days were 3-mile easy runs...have some spin, some weights, and a "long" run of 6 miles this weekend.  Life is rough right now, folks.

2018 Glass City Marathon: In a word, BUH

Buh.  Every single part of my body hurts from running the Glass City Marathon in Toledo, Ohio yesterday.

hurt hurt and more hurt.

I had some high hopes for a PR yesterday.  Alas, it wasn't meant to be.

It's not that the day didn't have a lot going for it.  The weather was fantastic, the course was as flat as ever, I had a good breakfast, my old friends who put us up made some pretty excellent pre-race coffee (and let us crash at their place), and Mother Nature managed to call before the race (for once!).  Also, pretty much no one showed up to race, so I had the course to myself.

Not really.  There were plenty of people there to watch me suffer.

Before the start, I was feeling pretty confident about a stress-free race.  I owed that good feeling to that Mother Nature call, but also to my Christmas Story throw-away shirt and my tie-dye shoes.

How could I not have had a good race with
these good luck charms?

But that good feeling had disappeared by mile 13.  I won't bore you with every little thought that went through my head per mile (most of those thoughts were "WHY IS THIS SO HARRRRRRD"), but I will bore you with my own little breakdown of the race:

Miles 1-4: Hey I'm doing OK....I have to go to the bathroom already?!?.

These were some good miles.  I was really focusing on not starting out too fast and running a 9:30 pace, which I pretty much did...until I had to use the port-a-john at mile 4 and wait for a bazillion years.  But I reasoned that it was still early, and I could make up the time...so I darted out of that port-a-john with a spring still in my tie-dyed step and resolved to catch up the 4:15 pacers.

Miles 5-9: Why does this feel so HARD?!?

I did catch up to and managed to pass the 4:15 pacers, and then I continued to truck along at my desired pace.  But by mile 9 my legs were kind of tired...and my left hip began to feel sore.  My hamstrings had started to whine a bit as well, but I kept telling myself to suck it up, buttercup--a marathon isn't supposed to feel good.  It's supposed to feel bad because that's why we run these things, don't we?  To make ourselves feel bad so we can collapse at the finish and swear at people.  Or, at least that's why I do it, anyway.

Miles 10-15: Let the BUH begin.

Mile 10 began with a nice trip to another exotic port-a-john along the side of a bike path.  I then managed some decent splits (9:30) until it all fell apart in mile 15.  My legs were heavy and dead, my left hip was really nagging me, and my left calf had decided it was going to join my left hip in whining at me.  My left leg pretty much didn't feel like it was going to work for much longer....so I decided two things: 1) my PR wasn't going to happen today, and 2) I was going to do walk/run intervals: 4 minutes on and 1 minute off.  The intervals were just what my left hip and calf needed, until....

Miles 16-24: Just busting out some intervals until I wear myself out 2 miles before the finish line.

While the intervals were a great idea, running the 4 minutes at breakneck speed to make up time was most definitely not.  As a result, I had to visit yet another port-a-john at mile 21 and I was pretty much spent by mile 24, where my left calf decided to cramp up along with my hip so I could no longer do 4 minutes of continuous running without these two mutinous body parts revolting with cramps.  But that didn't stop me from taking stupid race photos; I dug deep and found the energy for some stupidness.

I feel horrible oh look a camera WHEEEE

Miles 25-26.2: Just hobbling along to the finish.

Every time I tried to run, my left calf would cramp up quite nicely, making me stop and hobble for a few minutes.  That's pretty much how I made it to the finish, sucking up that cramp as I ran through the doors to the Glass Bowl stadium so I could at least look like I was running as I crossed the finish line.

Don't be fooled - that's a grimace, not a smile.

In the end, what matters are these things:

• I got to see good friends this weekend who put up with my getting up at 4 AM on a Sunday to go run 26.2 miles.
• I finished.  I had a really crappy time, but I finished.

Double buh.

• I got the medal.

• I tried to strangle a unicorn in Indiana on the way home.

Thanks for all your NO HELP during the race, magical creature.

• I'm going to sign up for this one again and now I am freaking determined to get the PR that I know is there for me on that course.  Until next year, Toledo.

Tomorrow's workout:  I'm thinking some light upper-body weights.  If a part of my body stops hurting, that is.

Day 5, Week 14: My top ten ways to screw up your marathon. You're welcome.

This morning was the very last run on my training plan: a 3 mile marathon pace (9:20) run.  So of course I woke up and it was eighteen degrees and snowing and windy and I had to bust out a balaclava and I was all AWESOME BRING ON THE SNOW:

Yay winter!  Not really!

Just kidding.  Here's how I really felt:

I wasn't going to take large dog with me because of the cold and snow and all, but as I went to head out the door without him he gave me the biggest, saddest WOOOOO I've ever heard, so of course I had no choice but to hook him up and take him for a spin in the cold snow dark.

We only did three miles, but all his slobber was frozen to the front of him when we got back.  I think he'd say that a little frozen slobber was worth the trek out into the cold to drag me around and try to pull me into ditches.  This morning I got a bonus--he tried to make me slide on the fresh snow and fall down when we took corners.  Good times.  What I will do to ensure the safety of my drywall and baseboards.

Anyway, since my marathon is a mere two days away, I have been planning out what's going to happen--or not happen--over the next few days to ensure that my 4:05 goal time becomes a reality.  I feel good about my training, but so much other stuff can derail the potential fame and glory of hitting your goal time.  In fact, let me tell you some things you can tell yourself in order to be well-trained for your marathon yet still screw it up (and I know these things because I have said them to myself at some point):

1) "I won't eat breakfast; I'll just have some gels."
2) "I don't need hill training even though the first 17 miles of the course is a net uphill."
3) "I know it's hot but I won't bring any extra water with me."
4) "I know I'm running 30 seconds above pace and didn't train for this pace, but I don't think it will affect my performance at all."
5) "I don't really need to gel until at least mile 10."
6) "Taking food from random strangers on the course?  What could go wrong?"
7) "I think it's OK if I eat all these fiber-filled vegetables the night before the race."
8) "New shoes on race day?  Sounds like a great idea!"
9) "I'll try out that new breathing technique I read about in Runner's World during the race."
10) And last but not least..."This race is at altitude and I live in the Midwest?  Shouldn't be a problem."

Where are the learnings?  Oh, here they are:

• I screw up.  A lot.  S'kay, though-that's how you learn.
• Large dog is addicted to running.
• My solution to everything I hate is to shake my fist at it.  Sometimes one of my fingers is raised as well.
• Winter running.  Double buh.
• I love how in the very first pic of this post I look like a cut-out figure pasted on top of a background of my little shack of a house.

Tomorrow's workout: Walking around the race expo in Dallas where it will be NOT WINTER.