Some running truths for your viewing pleasure.

I ran 11.5 miles on the treadmill this morning: A 2 mile warm up, some pickups, 2 x 1M repeats, 3 easy miles, 2 x 1M repeats, and 1.5 miles of cool down.

Truly epic, if I do say so myself.  And sweaty.  But since I had some time on my hands running to nowhere, I had time to ponder, reflect, pontificate, opine, and do some serious internal whining about a variety of running-related topics.

I am pontificating so hard I'm sweating.

During this epic 2-hour run, I specifically pontificated about a few running truths that always find runners at some point:

Running truth #1: Speed work both sucks and is awesome.

The only way to run faster during a race is to run faster during training.  Not all the time; in my case, it's just on Mondays and Wednesdays at 4 AM in my basement. Anyway, it's really too bad that running faster makes you feel like stopping and then, if you still don't stop, keeling over and dying, but it's the "almost dying" part of running faster that makes you...well....run faster.  You have to embrace that sucky death feeling of speed work to get to that awesome HOLY SHLAMOLY I JUST PR'D ALL OVER THE PLACE feeling after a race.


Running truth #2: All laws involving space and time dissolve when running speed intervals or repeats.

Time gets dilated and narrowed and all slowed down once you start any type of speed repeat or interval and all stretched out and sped up when running easy.  It's all explained in Einstein's law of objectivity or something like that. Aren't up on the science of this phenomenon?  Just go run really really fast for any length of time and you'll start bending and distorting time all on your own.

Just got finished bending time and boy am I tired.

Running truth #3: You're not in charge of your run--your gastrointestinal system is.

Just when you think you may be able to finish a run without any fear-inducing abdominal rumbles, your GI tract is all "HEY GUESS WHAT" and you're taking a pause for a very important cause.  Never forget--your GI tract is the one that calls the shots. 


Running truth #4: No matter how fast you're running, somewhere there is a dog asleep silently mocking you in his dreams.

Because dogs aren't stupid enough to wake up at 3 AM to eat breakfast and have coffee before getting on the treadmill at 4 AM.

His face is all "mock mock mockity mock"

And below is more truth disguised as "learnings:'

• Speaking of time dilations, I tried not to think about the fact that I really got on the treadmill at 3 AM this morning. Damn Daylight Savings Time.
• Speed work.  It sucks.  But it's good for you.  Do it.
• Every time I get all cocky and think I may not have to stop during a run my GI tract shows me who's boss.
• And every time I get all cocky and think large dog and I are having a good run he goes and drags me into a ditch.  This is yet another way he mocks me.

Tomorrow's workout: Spin and weights and all sorts of cross-training goodness.