Twin Cities Marathon 2013: If you don't hurt, you're not getting your money's worth.

Goofing before the marathon.

I have to stop being upset about my finish time for yesterday's Twin Cities Marathon.  4:19:54 official time; 4:15:55 my watch's official time.

I wanted a 4:10.  But I guess I didn't want it bad enough.

Let's do a little review of the miles, shall we?

Thoughts during miles 1-13:

"Yeah!  Alright!  I can do this!  I am so maintaining a 9:30 pace!  I know I said I would start at 9:44, but I am feeling awesome right now!"

Thoughts during miles 14-18:

"OK, not feeling so awesome.  But I can still do it.  I may not hit a 4:10, but a 4:15 would still be doable.  My quads are really starting to feel like blocks of wood, but I've felt this way before.  I can stick it out."

Mile 18.6 or so.

Thoughts during miles 19-21:

"My God I can't feel my quads.  Still busting out a 9:30 pace.  I'm really freaking tired.  I have to pee.  I'll use that port-a-john.  No line-BONUS!  God, it feels good just to sit down.  But gotta keep moving...."

Thoughts during miles 22-26.2:

"AIEEEEEEEEE."  (It's at this point I got sharp stitches in my back right below my rib cage on either side, as if someone were stabbing me with a knife.  It got hard to breathe and I had to stop and walk several times. It's when I stopped to walk that my left foot decided to keep trying to charlie horse on me.)  "Alright, you can run for a little bit before the pain starts again.  Push push push AIEEEEEEEE."


The last 5 miles were pretty much miserable for me.  What made it more miserable was that a lady got in my face when I was walking off a back cramp and told me to "dig deep."  You can imagine my response.

At least I crossed the finish line feeling as if I had nothing left to give.  No more gas in the tank.  It was all I could do to run the last half mile towards the finish.  And when I crossed the line, my legs seized, hurting so bad that I was whimpering slightly as I wound my way through the finishing medals, fruit, photo opportunities, and finisher shirts. The only comfortable position I could find was squatting oh-so-ladylike near the ground, which I did at my earliest convenience by a wall near the State Capitol (St. Paul) lawn.  So there I was, squatting near a wall, keening every now and then like a madwoman.

But, like Frank Shorter says, everyone hurts after a marathon.  "And if you don't hurt, you aren't getting your money's worth."

But I finished.

And my time, while decent for me, isn't what I wanted.  I feel I should have, could have done better. I have been replaying what I did wrong over and over again since I crossed that finish line, and here's what I have come up with:

• Not enough quad strength work.  I focused on upper body tons and did a lot of stuff for calves and hammies, but neglected my quads for the most part.
• My tempos weren't long enough.  6 mile tempos aren't cutting it for teaching me endurance at my race pace. I think I need to do some longer (10-12 mile) tempos at race pace for more specificity in my training.
• I skipped a few long runs.  I could tell.  Next time that will not happen.  Less racing on weekends and more training.
• I was sick all this week-and my lungs weren't 100%.  I was still coughing up multi-colored crap the night before the race.  I think the back-stabbing pains were from breathing heavier and taxing those muscles.  It must have been that or someone had busted out a voodoo doll of me without my knowledge.
• I mentally collapsed at mile 21, knowing that I had a 3 mile uphill ahead of me.  I was tired and freaked out.  Next time more sucking it up and keep on keepin' on.
• I should have stuck to the plan and raced the first half at 9:44 and then sped up to a 9:30 for the second half.  The excitement and adrenaline and the crowds got me all worked up into a "starting too fast" frenzy.  Total rookie mistake.

I just feel shitty that I had to walk.  But I should focus on the positives:

• My official time is 15 minutes better than my first marathon.  If you look at my watch time, it's almost 20 minutes better.  That alone should have me jumping for joy.  If I could jump right now; my quads are a tad sore today.
• I finished.  I didn't give up.  The thought of quitting never crossed my mind.  (The thought of how the hell I was going to make it for 5 more miles did, however.)
• I busted out a freaking awesome nearly 9:30 pace for nearly 21 miles.  Twenty-one miles.  I have never run that far that fast ever in my life. 
• This was only my second marathon.  I must remember it took me 4 half-marathons before I broke the 2 hour mark.

That 4:10 finish is in my sights.  I've signed up for the Glass City Marathon in Toledo again at the end of April, 2014.  It shall be mine.

How to get sick and get well 6 days before your marathon.

I have a marathon in two days (!).  So, of course, I managed to get a sinus infection six days before it.  I am freaking awesome that way.

Here's how to get sick before your marathon:  Race every weekend before it, running an obscene amount of miles.  Also run 20 miles one day and race a 15K the next, forcing yourself to don full-length compression sleeves afterwards.  Then clean your entire house, getting a big whiff of cleaning chemicals and making your sinuses vulnerable to infection.

Here's how to get better in 6 days:

Monday: Wake up feeling like someone took a bristle brush to the inside of your sinuses.  Scream "Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo" as loud as you can when you get up.  Go cycling in the pitch dark, and then sinus rinse when you get done.  Sinus rinse again before you go to bed.  Don't take any meds because you want your body to handle it.  Find a back-up marathon to run in case you can't run on Sunday.  Cry yourself to sleep.

Tuesday: Wake up with creeping congestion in your sinuses.  Sinus rinse in the morning and before bed.  Take ibuprofen to combat the mounting pressure in your face.  Complain profusely about the fact that you are sick to anyone who will listen.

Wednesday: Congestion hits you full-force.  Sinus rinse in the morning, afternoon, and night even though the package clearly states not to do that when your sinuses are blocked.  Take ibuprofen during the day so you can't feel the pressure in your face rising so much that your teeth feel like they will pop out of the top of your head.  Get called into a 2-hour meeting when your congestion is at its worst and get questions rapid-fired at you.  Seriously consider not running your marathon, actually going so far as to almost cancelling your hotel reservations.  Complain again to anyone who will listen.  Break down and take NyQuil just so you can sleep.

Thursday: Wake up to find your congestion has magically disappeared.  Wonder suspiciously where it went. Sinus rinse in the morning and at night.  Break down and take some DayQuil during the day.  Realize that you may just be able to run your marathon.  Go home and pack.

Friday: Sinus rinse just because you're in the habit of doing it now.  Get up and realize you have parti-colored stuff coming out of openings in your face-and that this is a good thing.  Write a blog post about your sick experiences this week.  Realize that you will definitely be able to run your marathon, although you may have to spit, hack, and blow your nose for 26.2 miles.

 Now that this whole sickness thing is out of the way, I can focus on my marathon goals.My ideal goal is to run this thing in around 4:10.  If I cross the finish line anywhere near that number I will break down and cry immediately afterwards.  On the flip side, if something happens during the race (i.e., spitting and coughing slow me down), I will be happy with a 4:20.  If things go horribly awry (there is a hill that spans 3 entire miles at the end of the course!), then I will settle for crossing the finish line in an upright position.  Other goals I have include: running the entire thing, not having to stop at a port-a-john, and not having to poop at any time during the race.

Oh, and having fun.  And being able to smile whilst in mile 26 at what I have just accomplished.